06/16/2026
***BREAKING NEWS***
This is Howard Handupme with the latest Cretaceous culinary clamorings. It appears that a herb of Swineasauras' have been spotted in and around Asheville!
These giant tasty beasts have been spotted at Highland, Zillicoah, and The RAD, weighing down people's plates and devouring their hunger!
Locals and tourists alike have been flocking to the Triceratruck, where the Swineasauras love to gather. Hoping for not only a glimpse, but also a taste of the rare, delicious dinosaur.
We have reports there will be a group of them this Wednesday, looking to interrupt the massively popular "Rock Band Night" at The River Arts District Brewing Company
Keep in mind these tasty beasts have been known to be tamed by washing them down with a Praline Root Beer Float, also available at the Triceratruck.
Be on the lookout everyone, and don't miss your chance to see if Asheville's newest sandwich sensation can live up to meteoric hype that has flying around!