08/18/2026
What a weird picture for a farm to post, huh? Don't worry, I'll add pretty flower pics in the morning.
This small sink cleared of dishes represents a huge victory for me. I have made no secret of the fact that I am autistic and ADHD and these neurotypes already cause me to have a profound struggle with task initation and completion. Since my injury, my medications do not work the way they used to so I have struggled even more with daily tasks. I have struggled so much, not just with the physical ability to stand in front of a sink for any period of time to wash dishes which makes them pile up relentlessly, but also with the mental capacity to start and complete tasks. It is one of the things that led to a deep depression and abundant feelings of shame since my spinal cord injury. Especially since mom has had to help with things that, I, an adult, should be capable of doing myself.
My doctor and I have been changing my medications to help improve my functionality and we may have found the golden ticket. Today, for the first time in a year, I washed both sinks and a counter full of dishes by myself. Did it take all day because my legs still won't stand that long and the heat from the water makes me physically ill? Absolutely. But, I did it.
Today is the first time in over a year I feel like myself. Today is the first time in over a year that I don't feel like a complete and abject failure faking my way through a recovery that I feared would never actually happen from a neuroimmune condition so rare that our small county has twice as many hashtag mentions as it does. Today is the first time I really feel like I will recover and be me again and I was so excited I had to share it with all of you.
