12/08/2026
Trevor the Sausage and the Great Heatwave
It was the hottest day of the summer at Smith & Ellis Butchers, and Trevor the Sausage was beginning to regret his career choice.
Usually, Trevor was a proud sausage. Plump, perfectly seasoned and made from the finest pork, he enjoyed nothing more than sitting proudly in the display counter while customers admired his impressive girth.
But today was different.
“Blimey,” Trevor muttered, as the temperature climbed. “I’m starting to feel a bit well done.”
Dan the Master Butcher walked past and noticed Trevor looking worried.
“You alright, Trevor?”
“I’m melting, Dan!”
“You’re a sausage, Trevor.”
“I know! That’s the problem!”
Dan opened the refrigerated display a little wider, and Trevor immediately shuffled closer.
“Ahhhhh,” he sighed. “That’s better.”
Unfortunately, Trevor soon discovered another problem.
Every time the door opened, warm air rushed in.
“CLOSE THE DOOR!” Trevor shouted.
A customer looked around.
“Did that sausage just speak?”
Trevor froze.
Dan quickly stepped in.
“No, no. Must have been the air conditioning.”
Trevor glared at him.
“I definitely heard something,” said the customer.
“Probably the chorizo,” said Dan.
Trevor was furious.
“Oi! Leave my spicy cousin out of this!”
By lunchtime, Trevor had developed a cunning survival strategy. He positioned himself directly beneath the coldest part of the refrigeration unit, wearing a tiny pair of sunglasses borrowed from one of the staff.
“I shall survive,” he announced.
“Trevor,” said Dan, “you’re looking ridiculous.”
“Maybe. But I’m not cooked.”
And so Trevor spent the rest of the afternoon keeping cool, avoiding the sunny shop window and reminding everyone of his golden rule:
On a hot day at Smith & Ellis, keep your cool — and whatever you do, don’t let Trevor get grilled.
By closing time, Trevor was still perfectly chilled.
Although, mysteriously, somebody had put a little sign next to him:
TODAY’S SPECIAL — HOT SAUSAGE
Trevor wasn’t amused.
“Very funny, Dan.”
And Dan just smiled.
