13/04/2025
2020 — after lockdown — I hung out with a lady at Cubana Club at Adetokunbo Ademola Crescent, Wuse 2. That evening, we sat by the lounge, ordered a big catfish and some drink.
That was a year before the landmark burial that catapulted the name of Obi Cubana to all and sundry.
Prior to that burial, he's a low-key man. He would dress simple and behind the camera.
Not to digress...
That day at Cubana, Wuse 2, it was my first time of meeting the lady, and we were to get along. Normal nah. Na man I be. So, hanging out with asampetecious asampete isn't a bad thing. Abụghị m arụsị a pịrị apị.
However, immediately Obi Cubana stepped into the lounge, the lady I was with fled, or flown within a twinkle of an eye, leaving me there to rush to Obi Cubana.
It was very embarrassing. Everything happened at the open place. People were watching. The lady didn't even care about who was with him. At that moment, I must have looked like ikwiikwi before her.
She was introducing herself to Obi Cubana, pretending to have met him in an unknown place.
Men can understand this kind of feeling. You are with a lady, she sees another man and acts like you don't exist.
Then, Obi Cubana wasn't this popular. He was the big guy behind the scene. He dressed in short , wearing slip-on and black-top-round-neck.
Guess what Obi Cubana did?
He noticed what happened to me. He stepped forward to where I seated like an orphan, taking comfort with my fish which I was using fork to munch.
He stretched out his hand to shake with him. The way the Igbo greet. He asked:
"Nwanne, ị na-eme enjoy?"
I was like: "o nwekwanụ nke a ma ụma eme? Ụwa bụ ofu mbịa."
Bro code. I vibed like we have known for ages. This got the girl dumbfounded. She was shocked, surprised, and frozen.
I composed and comport, this time, washed my hand to eat the fish with hands.
Aunty was walking like a cheating wife caught pant-down with gateman inside banana plantation where they were having romps of Selima nkuli nkuli on the beat.
"Wow. So, Obi Cubana know you?" She asked,
I didn't reply, rather, I was munching my fish, sipping from the glass-cup, filled with Heineken. And my shoulder pads erected like a man's healthy third leg in early hours of the day.
Silence.
"I have actually met him in Lagos. I never knew he knows you. Look at the way he greeted you."
Because I shook hands with Obi Cubana, automatically I have money. Her rent expired. In fact, she needed 350k for house rent. Then, the value of 350k is more than 1M now.
First meeting oo. House rent. 350k. Because I shook hands with Obi Cubana.
No problem.
"Give me your account number. I am expecting money, once it arrives, I will send you 500k. 350k is too small."
She was happy. She sent her account number. This is 2025, that money still never show. If é show, I go send am. But e never show. And will never show in Jesus name — Amen!
That was the first time I met Obi Cubana. He didn't know me, but seeing how his fellow man was publicly embarrassed, he gave me that brotherhood honor. Brotherhood is proud of you.
As for the girl chọrọ 350k house rent in 2020, I still dey expect the money. The way I am seeing it, it will never show.
I paused, she paused; all of us paused!
