10/07/2026
Come do morning chores with me while we talk about the questions we ask after someone has been sexually assaulted.
I’m not talking about the questions investigators get to ask. I’m talking about the questions asked by fellow community members. Neighbors. Friends. Family.
Today is the anniversary of my being sexually assaulted in college.
I went to visit an ordained pastor in seminary housing, and people still asked me why I went there. Like I should have known better.
So when I hear people ask why Jane Doe went to a frat house… I know that question.
I’m not saying I was a better victim. I’m saying I fit much more neatly into the narrow cultural picture of the kind of victim people claim they’ll believe.
And it still wasn’t enough.
The location changes. Maybe the clothes do. Maybe the major, even. The interrogation never does.
