09/04/2026
Hard day already on the homestead. Today I lost my favorite goose. She was to be the one who brought me higher in my breeding stock, the one i had worked with over and over to claim her heart like she had claimed mine... and now, now shes gone and im torn. Sassy Moon came to me from a friend. Sassy had started becoming my shadow every time I went to their pasture... following me, rubbing her head on me, allowing lovens and purring at me. She would stand taller everytime I called her beautiful, coming closer and closer to show me just how beautiful she was... to say im ugly crying, is true. She wasnt just a goose, she was my dream goose, my feathered friend and the head hancho of my goose flock, they adored her, followed her around, she would preen them just like a momma would. She called everyone to dinner, made sure all the babies ate and drank silently standing guard while they did. At night she made sure everyone stayed safe. My heart is broken and I will forever miss her. The heat was just too much for her. I try not to blame myself as ive been super sick the last week so I havent been outside as much as usually with the heat making it hard to breath.
I just need to figure things out. Not for me, no, never for me, but for everything else. The house, the homestead, the animals we raise, the kids, the family, everything. Depression sucks and sometimes you gotta fight tooth and nail to get out of it. Doesn't make it anyone's fault, doesnt mean your blaming anyone, not even yourself. It just means, life has taken a turn and you need to figure out what path is next.
Keep your head up, keep going, return to the real you, you've got this!