10/18/2025
* MY FARM JOURNAL October 31, 2014 *
“In the Corner between Death and a Door”
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It was a starless night, and a thin blanket of snow shrouded the crimson October leaves. It was a cold night, but neither the wet nor the wind was more chill than fear’s icy whisper just then.
She lay on the barn floor dying... my childhood dream.... The impossible promise God had given me then was backed against death’s door now...
The horse was too far gone... no vet in this world could bring my baby back...
Thud... That sick groan and slow, painful thrash of her hoof against the ground. Then stillness.
I held her head in my hands, softly caressing it as the tears caught in my throat. “Nooo, you won’t. Live!”
The groaning and slow thrash resumed. Her sides heaved heavily.
This is where I was... Backed in a corner with a giant. What’s yours look like?- How are you going to take that monster out? How are you going to hold a dying dream? Rise out of vises, ashes, and walk in something more?...
MY STORY
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It was spring 20 years prior to this giant... I was a child; wildly singing: “Our God is an Awesome God....” But a careless comment that Sunday silenced my voice for almost two decades... I would just choke up. Shut down, aware of myself. (This is important) Years later, about 40-days before Moon Pie went down, I had a dream. In it, I saw what was coming, and the only way out. Praise. (PRAISE puts focus on something (not yourself or the problem – it magnifies what your praising to a place forefront above all else)
Behind the scenes SHUT DOWN
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Listen, there’s a reason Satan shuts praise down. Understand it: He knows God inhabits praise and fights your battles through it!
Satan (Lucifer then) was created to bring worship to God. When he did, power manifested. (Psalms 22:3) But Lucifer lost that place when he turned the focus on himself to raise SELF up to “be like God”. (Isaiah 14:12-14, Ezekiel 28:14-16)
Satan hates YOU because YOU are created in in the image Lucifer wanted: “God’s image” and YOU were designed to worship (see Genesis 1:27, Psalms 150, Matt 21:15-15, John 4:23-24)
When you praise... God fights your battles... (2 Chronicles 20 - read the story of a king, who when he praised, the spirit of God advanced before him and destroyed his aggressive enemy).
Suddenly there’s God to be reckoned on your behalf - facing that giant. So YES! Satan’s tactic is to turn your focus in on YOU, silencing your praise.
Psalms 22:3 But You (God) are holy, O You who inhabits the praises of (Your people) Israel.
STORY CONTINUED
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Holding my baby’s head in the presence of the giant … I felt no strength to fight this one, but it was still do or die.
THE DREAM
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I was reminded of that dream 40 days prior: In it I had seen my horse and a dark enemy. I wanted to run, but I raised my voice! Praise filled my lungs and I fell into grace, like a body of water. And that water (which I knew to be grace) carried me higher and higher with a powerful force. The fear left. The dream ended in victory. Very simple.
It was so vivid I awoke singing, and heard God telling me to never again be silent but to praise.
REAL TIME
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THUD... Here I was... real time... backed in a corner with that sick groan and inflamed hoof scraping the ground... Here, I had a choice.
I began to praise right there and to recall His word … even as I lay awake - His faithfulness… three days later that horse fought to stand, and walked out alive.
Mind you, full recovery from colic/founder wasn’t overnight, it was a journey that was highly journaled and walked out. Each day I wrote... Sometimes it was just two minutes longer she exercised, the angle of her stance, her eye and body language. – So much still kicked my gut to see, and quitting looked easier…
But again, praise puts focus on something - while walking through the shadow of death!
We don’t deny facts! But we acknowledge there’s something HIGHER than fact! TRUTH. And Truth CHANGES Facts!
“And he who had died came out bound hand and foot with graveclothes, and his face was wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Loose him, and let him go.”’ - John 11:44
THE ENDING
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Lower and lower my giant bowed until Moon Pie JPH and I shared the glorious moments together again galloping ba****ck down the MOUNTAIN paths (barefoot – no horse shoes!) Oh yeah!!
WHAT’S YOUR GIANT in 2025
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Your story might not be so dramatic, or it’s more so. You’ve got giants too!
‼️SAME PRINCIPLE: God wants to fight for you too, through YOUR PRAISE ‼️
Acts 16:25-26 But at midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them.
Suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the foundations of the prison were shaken; and immediately all the doors were opened and everyone's chains were loosed.
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