02/21/2024
I have been remiss on my posts & communications as well as "Shokota' training" posts as of late. i do apologize. It may seem to most my sister and i have withdrawn a bit, and honestly i know i have. We are faced with a change in our lives and future.. our father has been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor. We have exhausted all the avenues available.. we as well as our dad are coming to grips with this and finding our focus and "life's direction" of what is to come. We still get up and work, take care of our daily tasks and lives as best we can as well as take turns helping and caring for our father. To do this for me is a constant battle to stay "in control, and have direction" and not let emotion run amuck. This is a very short term battle that we can NOT win, it's not going to get better, but still a battle he has to wage and come to grips with and we will do our very best to "just be", for him and ourselves and family. Please be patient with my nieces, sister and myself as dividing care, isn't easy nor do we complain but it does wain on our daily our look and honestly mood. To handle this daily (again it is terminal, and all WE can do is make him comfortable) and try to function in our own daily tasks of life, it is hard to answer "how is your dad?.. well he is dying, slowly a little each day" is a cut hard answer but that is the hand he & we have been dealt... it just becomes hard to say 3 or 4 times a day... sorry for the "shortness/ ugliness" of the answer but i hope none of you will have to answer this well meaning but gut punch question daily. Please show him, my sister and nieces as much compassion as you may find, or in the least step back and wait and we will find you when we can catch our breaths... in advance thank you and God Bless my dad...
