There Does Not Exist

There Does Not Exist We questions space and time to invent distinctly curious, high quality beers that stand at the intersection of art, science, and imagination.

Friends... what a trip! Somehow, every year, we find ourselves surrounded (and humbled) by a vast sea of beer lovers, ho...
06/04/2026

Friends... what a trip! Somehow, every year, we find ourselves surrounded (and humbled) by a vast sea of beer lovers, hop heads, brewers, movers, shakers, and good time havers - pouring our wares and talking shop until we lose our voices. Pretty wild for a rag tag bunch of small town Cosmic Cowboys™️ 🤠
Massive thank you to , , and ALL THE FESTIVAL ORGANIZERS AND VOLUNTEERS for bringing everyone together and putting on another unforgettable weekend. And to our incredible customers - we simply couldn’t, and wouldn’t, do it without you! Y’all make the late night knockouts and CIPs all worth while.
And friends, don’t let anyone fool ya - Craft Beer is alive and well. Until next time, homies!
ThereDoesNotExist

Friends! The weekend ain’t over yet… infact, it’s time to rip another SOWING THE SUNDAY🔥Our good friends will be parked...
05/31/2026

Friends! The weekend ain’t over yet… infact, it’s time to rip another SOWING THE SUNDAY🔥
Our good friends will be parked up and slanging smash burgers until they vanish and we’re backing ‘em up with FULL pours of our beloved Kölsch bier for a cool $3.50. as every Sunday calls for…
So whether you’re shaking off yesterday’s festivities, dodging the Sunday Scaries, or simply looking for an excuse to drink a crispy boi, we’ve got you covered🤘
Come post up, grab a burger, crush a Kölsch, and give this weekend the sendoff it deserves!
BURGERS ➡️ 1pm - Until Sell Out
KÖLSCH ➡️ $3.50 All Day Long

ANALOG OCTOPUS • West Coast IPA • 7.0%Analog Octopus is a hyper modern, eight limbed, double dry hopped, mollusk style W...
05/28/2026

ANALOG OCTOPUS • West Coast IPA • 7.0%
Analog Octopus is a hyper modern, eight limbed, double dry hopped, mollusk style West Coast IPA brewed with our Texas homies 🐙 This beer started off, in the brewhouse, with a base of two different Pilsner malts and a healthy portion of flaked rice to keep the body and color extremely light, so the hops can become the focal point. Starting the kettle and whirlpool, we assembled a base hopping of Simcoe, Citra, NZ Cascade and Simcoe Dynaboost. Post brewhouse, we fermentation hopped the beer with some beautifully fruity and dank Colombus Cryo. Then, post fermentation, we used all eight arms to dump in bags and bags of Simcoe, Columbus Cryo, Nelson, Citra, and even a touch of Mosaic for all you Cephalopods out there. The resultant beer is explosive with notes of gooseberry, jasmine flower, white raspberry, and pineapple guava.
Now flowing in the taproom on draft with a limited amount of cans available to take home! If you’re lucky, this will end up at a watering hole near you🔥

Earthlings! Like children trying to sleep on Christmas Eve, we’re just DAYS away from the greatest weekend of the year. ...
05/28/2026

Earthlings! Like children trying to sleep on Christmas Eve, we’re just DAYS away from the greatest weekend of the year. The Invitational Beer Festival 🍾


Every year it’s an immense honor to pour our wares for hundreds of die hard craft beer fans and customers. Then, add to that, the fact that we’re pouring - shoulder to shoulder - with our closest friends, peers, industry greats, and frankly some of the greatest brewers the trade has ever known. Whoa dude, we’re not tearing up - thats just a little hop dust in our Cosmic Cowboy™️ eyes…


To be frank - our list this year is 🔥 We’ve been burning the candle at both ends to brew and package some TDNE CLASSICS as well as a plethora of one off, collaborative beers that have never seen the light of day 🕯️

Our 2026 list will include:

Black Antler (Barleywine with Vanilla)

The Last Crossing (Saison)

Rowhaus Pils (Pilsner)

Garver (Bohemian Pilsner)

60 Days In Hell (Helles Lager)

Analog Octopus (WCIPA Collab with our buds from )

Celebrate the day, homies! Endless $3.50 FULL POURS of everyone’s favorite Kölsch bier, Sowing The Sun, ALL DAY!This is ...
05/24/2026

Celebrate the day, homies! Endless $3.50 FULL POURS of everyone’s favorite Kölsch bier, Sowing The Sun, ALL DAY!
This is not a test, friend… This is real life.. Its simply Sowing The SUNday.. Grab some lunch to go, order some pies to the taproom, DoorDash or whatever.. It’s Sowing the Sunday. Dude.
Lean on Sowing The SUNday to keep ya HIGH on this 3 day weekend!

.
05/22/2026

.

Friends! Lets chat… Are you living a Kölsch-centric lifestyle? If not, the Cosmic Cowboys™️ at your humble TDNE tasting ...
05/17/2026

Friends! Lets chat… Are you living a Kölsch-centric lifestyle? If not, the Cosmic Cowboys™️ at your humble TDNE tasting room are here to help! For just a few minutes of your time & $3.50 you can come warm the soul with a FULL POUR of our beloved Kölsch bier, Sowing The Sun.
You know why, pal? Its SOWING THE SUNDAY 🌞 Come let us make your Pillowtop™️ floweth over.

Address

4070 Earthwood Lane, Suite 110
San Luis Obispo, CA
93401

Opening Hours

Tuesday 3pm - 8pm
Wednesday 3pm - 8pm
Thursday 3pm - 8pm
Friday 3pm - 8pm
Saturday 12pm - 8pm
Sunday 12pm - 8pm

Telephone

+18053512664

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when There Does Not Exist posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share

Category