10/08/2026
The mystery of the abandoned panties…
Running a restaurant is a funny old business. You meet all sorts. The lovely, the grumpy, the first dates, the regulars who practically have their own table, and the occasional person who makes you question how we ever managed to become the dominant species.
Yesterday was one of those wet, miserable Cape winter days. Exactly what we needed, and we were full. Properly full.
With the garden out of action, we were limited to what we could cram inside, so we made hay while the sun most definitely wasn’t shining and packed everyone in like Tetris blocks. 100 people having a perfectly normal Sunday lunch.
Until a pair of well-worn ladies’ knickers appeared in the middle of the restaurant floor.
Not tucked under a chair. Not discreetly abandoned behind a pot plant. Not somewhere you could reasonably assume they had fallen out of a handbag.
Smack bang in the middle of the bloody restaurant.
Now I have questions.
Whose were they? How did they get there?
At what point during Sunday lunch does someone, presumably identifying as a woman, decide that enough is enough, the knickers are coming off? And just how do you actually achieve this in a packed restaurant without anybody noticing?
Were they removed at the table? Did their owner go to the loo and then carry them back into the restaurant before casually dropping them on the floor? Were they already in a handbag and simply made a bid for freedom?
There are 100 potential suspects and absolutely no witnesses.
Nobody claimed them, nobody looked particularly concerned about having suddenly become knickerless.
They just sat there, eating their lunch, while a pair of rogue panties lay in the middle of the floor.
We will never know.
The knickers have since been removed from active service, but the mystery remains.
